Shopping Alone

Today I went library to return books and went shopping after that. Was all alone for the whole time. But I like the feeling. It gives me time to clear my mind. I just feel like being alone, shopping here & there, wondering like an aimless soul, looking at cute and pretty stuffs. I bought gifts for myself and my two sis. I miss my elder sis. It's like a long time since we share talks. I hope she's doing fine in life, work and school.


At times, i really feel that i had convinced myself. I had enough energy to move on. But it's not true at all. I haven't even take the first step out, in believing in reality. The truth is that no matter how perfect i talk about my decisions, how perfect i had planned it and make it sound so perfect & make it like they are things i will do, i still cannot face reality, which is the most important & very first step i need to take. I really have no courage & energy to face reality. Who is there to help & understand me. I am just a weakling..